Sounds to me like mild anxiety attacks, baby ones. Please take care, as giving up work and retreating may be the last thing you need. Yes, it may relieve the anxiety for the short term and can make your world gradually smaller.
My lovely one, this is very great pressure for you, anxiety (if that is what it is) is one of the easier behaviours to resolve, can I suggest you approach your doctor to chat about this and see if this may be anxiety. Just the description sounds familiar and it is worth knowing, but I am no doctor so my assessment may be incorrect and it is something else.
Anxiety is a rush or flooding emotion which will overwhelm you. It comes on very quickly in the space of a couple of minutes and takes about 45 minutes to calm down. It may leave you exhausted and weary. It is hormonal (can also be exhilarating) and may interfer with the rhythm of your breathing (too much or too little) so often regulating breathing can calm you. Response is good to CBT.
How do I know?
I suffer from ADD and anxiety goes with that sometimes. It leaves me feeling unattached to my body and cold with pins and needles in my hands and feet. Sinking feelings in my tummy, it passes and back to normal within an hour or so. I do not have full blown panic attacks though, just fearful episodes very occasionally. Knowing what they are then this too shall pass.
If this is the case, it is uncomfortable but non fatal. The human body can cope with its own hormones so it is scary but not damaging.
V
That sounds like what I have been experiencing. Today I felt better. I just forced myself to do little things, and once I got started I was able to keep going. I took frequent breaks and drank lots of chamomile tea. I still have more to do, but it feels much more manageable right now. I keep telling myself that right now I am not in it to impress anyone, or to save my job. Just to do what I can to survive the next few months with as much dignity and strength as I can muster. If I am let go, then that is ok. I will move on. If not--well, sometimes that feels like the scarier option at this point, but the money is good and motivating.
40s 2teens M14Y BD-10/12/13 rec-1/14 BD2-5/14 rec2-9/14 EA disc-10/14 4/15-BD 3 and triangulation ensues Served with D6/15 MS forced to leave7/15 D agreement signed 8/16 final 5/17
