Never did get a response from W on using her tax refund to file. We haven't had a lot of communication until this past weekend. Went back and forth a few times, but I've discovered that even though she'll hint around it, if I flat out ask her if she's filing, she either doesn't respond or changes the subject. She did tell me that she was car shopping and that her lease is up at the end of May and she doesn't know what she'll do after that.
Our conversation softened after we talked about how we both interpret each other's email/texts as confrontational, even though that's not the intent. Anyways, I asked her if she wanted to join the kids and I to color Easter eggs. She asked about doing dinner as well, so she came over on Mon night for a couple hours. Our interaction was spotless- no signs of anger or bitterness. The kids were in a great mood too (because we were 'family' again?).
I sent her a text yesterday afternoon thanking her for coming over. That it was good to see her and that I thought the kids had fun. She responded (this morning) that she had fun too, but it's still uncomfortable. Responded that I agreed- it feels like old times, but it doesn't. She agreed.
In the past, I would have followed up with asking if she wanted to get together sometime, but I resisted. IF we decide at some point down the road to give it a shot, it's got to go slowly (for both our sakes). If not, I'm ok with that. It's strange how she feels like just another person to me now- not the 'love of my life' she once did. I still may invite her to church with the kids and I this weekend, but I want to see how the next few days go. Now that my anger has diminished these past several mos, I'm slowly discovering that my 'we won't be friends if we D' stance was mainly out of pain and wanting to 'punish' W. Maybe that changes should we actually D?? We don't have to be best friends, but maybe we can be 'cool'...
