So, another day and another roller coaster. I really do not know how much of this I can take. Its tearing me apart. I feel like I am at a cliff and don't know the way how to stop the fall.
How about 180'ing this
Originally Posted By: 11OCT
We had a long discussion about our session last night. I tried not to, but I broke some of the 37 rules last night.
Originally Posted By: 11OCT
Before I go on, let me get ya'lls opinion on our counselor. My wife noticed that he quietly "attacked" me (for lack of better words) and even said to her, "I don't know if this is saveable or not, that is up to you." If a counselor was pro-marriage, he wouldn't say that, would he? My wife seemed to think that he made sense... Is this normal? Or should we seek another?
I am faltering, ya'll. I just feel like I don't have the strength to keep up the fight even though I so desperately want to keep us together. I don't know how to keep going on and am hurting badly. I look in the mirror every day and the first thing I have to say is "I am working on me." Every day. Because that's all I can do.
In our conversation, we talked about both paths. She isn't ready to throw in the towel, but at the same time she said that she is jealous of her sister (the one I had issues with) becasue the sister and her husband are getting a divorce and yet they are good friends.
I just don't know what to do or how to fight for us. Which of the books can ya'll recommend?
Have you read DR?
Counseling at the stage you are at is not going to be very productive. If I were spending money on it - I might try a DB coach.
I think you wife is telling you something above with her sister. She wants to get divorced and stay on as friends.
Right now the best advice I can give you is to re-read my first post, read DR, and stop trying to FIX your marriage.
DETACH is the single most important step in this process.
It will get better but it might not be the way you are EXPECTING it to happen.
