Thanks guys, you are really the best in my life. I can not even image my life without you all. I wish we can go further and help each other with some dinner ideas, well maybe that would be too many recipes on the board.
Well, I had a better day today. Yesterday I signed the Sworn Financial Statement at my L office. Geez, it was quite a job to get it all done.
I really agree with all of you. I have been making mistake after mistake. Yes and it's true, I am going on cheeseless tunnels, and I am driving the road to nowhere.
I am a person that resolves stuff. I don't sit too long on a problem, I like to fix it, resolve it and clean it. I do not like to drag myself into some circle of problems with no solution.
But, and this is a big BUT, I will stop what I was doing, stop being plan B, stop giving in just to get some chance my H will see that I am a nice person.
Enough, I really had enough. My kids had enough. He is hurting my kids and I. Maybe H will be himself again one day, but he is disgusting right now.
H did not even called S15 on his BDay. For me, this is the straw that broke the camel's back. I decided to face what it is. My H was always selfish, lazy, annoying. He was always Mr.right guy. I will stop faking that this was a nice H and that I can't leave without him.
No, by the contrary. I will problem be better without him to shut me down.
I am a good person, I am very responsible, I make it happen, I resolve, work hard, I take care after all the stuff in a house. Pay bill, keep track with doctors, cook, clean, wash, work on yard, I do it all, always did it all.
So, be it. He does respect me neither gives me value and importance. It's my time now. I want to grow and be what I am thinking I can accomplish. Fortunately, I am busy now and will be even busier with the things I want to do for my career.
I will be polite, talk about the kids when needed, but that's about it. You are all right, time is the only thing that may help my sitch. I will take the time and do something for myself now.
RD - You are right on. I love my H, but he is using this love for his own benefit, he is using my good will to feel less guilty.
V - great words. In some ways, it is also abuse. H is using my love so he can have it all and think it is very normal. Well, I do not want any open M, so it is not for me and I am the only one that can impose some respect after all.
T - You are so right sweetie. I am the only one that can stand up for myself and stop H and his destructive behavior. My kids are good individuals. With all what is going on in their lives, they are still doing very good.
So, it's time for H to go and deal with his life and I will do the same on my side.
Jim - You are also right. I would like to fix H. He seems broken sometimes, other times I think he knows what he is doing and that he just want to lie to me.
I will post later about my little vacations plans and going back to school.
