Yesterday (3/29) was a little odd. We took a break after the conversation to give each other some space. Shortly thereafter, she woke S up from his nap. W decided she was going to act all buddy buddy with me right after our conversation, though she did mention in there that she did not want to work on our relationship. The entire time she did not believe that I knew she was still talking to him. No big deal. We did have some nice conversations and a few laughs. It was a good time hanging out with our S3. Just strange that she would act like that.
I went to my soccer game. It felt good. Came home. W and I read books and put son to bed. She was acting as if nothing happened. Good around our son. I stayed in his room a little longer because he wanted me to stay some more as it apparently helps him sleep (such a manipulator). When leaving his room, W was already in bed, possibly sleeping, at least acting like she was. She was planning to get up to go to an early AA meeting. An appropriate one. So I did not bring up the request to block communications with OM then, felt it was the wrong time. Got some quality time with the pets instead.
This morning she said "I love you" and gave me a kiss, like nothing was wrong, prior to her leaving for her meeting. When I was leaving for work, she came up to me giving me attention and expecting some affection. I followed through with it. All that I could think of, though, was that she was attempting to manipulate me into believing that she was not lying about anything.
She sent me a funny email today, I did not respond. She called me mid-day, of which I did not answer. She then immediately sent me a text asking me to call about a story about our S (nothing important or dire). I waited about an hour and called her back. It was a nice story, impressive on his part, sad topic though. Regardless, it all just seemed too staged.
She had another meeting tonight, different type. Gave me time to pick up S from MIL and take him to the park. Saw some of my friends there (with their kids). Had a good time. Got home before W did, checked the keylogger, sure enough, a couple more messages to OM. W got home, we watched a movie with our S, pleasant time. Put him to bed. I went to the kitchen and she came in after asking "what are you going to do?" I responded, "I would like to block him now." She sat there for a couple seconds, and agreed to it. WIN. I did not even have to get to the no internet.
Apparently our cell phone service does not support blocking numbers, I tried it anyway. There was a response saying "not supported", she asked what that was, I just said "confirmation ," instead I installed a text to email app (mostly hidden), of which forwards the text to an email that I have access to and does not leave a copy in the text inbox. If I need to get a phone keylogger, I will. This should work for now. Later on I may change the text forwarder to include all texts (forwarded but not deleted) just to make sure.
I then blocked his FB account. If I see him in her friends list, I will know. Still have the computer keylogger as well.
I asked if she understood why I was doing this. Her response was "because it is what you want." I went into some boundary talk, about how it was necessary for my own mental well being. How she has them too, and I respect them when they are brought up. Her expression during this time was none too pleased. Expected. In closing, I said "I greatly appreciate this." I am sure it left a sour taste in her mouth, but I really do.
I am not sure what will come of all of this. Of course, no one does. Still going to work on myself. Work on the attraction, 180s, etc. I know she feels forced and "stuck" right now. I am trying to decide what I should do at this point. Romance her, or pull back a little? Play it by ear/see how she reacts in the next couple of days? Wait to see if there is no contact? Stay positive, confident, upbeat for myself at least.
