Old Dog seeks new trick 11

[Old Dog]

I'm lying in bed thinking of the convo we had this morning and recalled this.

WW - OK I know you don’t want me to be here and it’s obviously too difficult for you to look at and OK, that’s fine but we cannot risk that (me swearing at her in anger - not good I know) happening again and the children looking at it and that being their experience.

OD - Why not, it happens?
WW - Yeah it does happen because …

OD - They’ve got to find out.
WW - Yeah OK, but I lived it when I was a kid.

OD - So why are you doing it now?
WW - No it’s not about that.

OD - Yes it is. You’ve chosen this way. You’ve chosen to do this. You’ve decided this is what you’re doing. It’s your choice.
WW - I’m not going down this route.

OD - It is entirely your choice.
WW - It is something that has happened. It’s a dynamic between the two of us that had happened. I’ve had the bollox to come out and say no this isn’t enough.

OD - You haven’t had the bollox to fix it. You just left it and left it and left it and than haven’t had the bollox to try and do something about it.
WW - At intervals throughout the marriage I’ve said …

OD - Said. We didn’t do anything about it.
WW - Yeah I went to therapy once.

OD - That didn’t work out too well because it wasn’t the right therapist it didn’t …
WW - Oh god OD how many times have I had this conversation? I’m not having this conversation.

OD - No, I don’t want it.

I got drawn into it a bit rather than STFU. And then I remembered and changed it abruptly to logistical arrangements.

But the interesting thing is her saying she lived it as a kid. Her elder brother was the apple of his mother's eye. He could do no wrong which made their father very jealous. Enough to take it out on her brother and have an affair (I think that's right). They survived the crisis and are still together. And yet she still can't see that you can work things out.