Just read your sitch ... a short one but one that covers some time as far as the calendar.
I have learned so much here, alot of us have.... but those lessons were not ones we wanted to learn, was more like we were forced to out of survival. Looks like you are and have been stuck, fearful to move in either direction, why>? ... in a word FEAR. Your mind cycles, you are fixated on your unhappiness, that resentment is building and in your case directed at your H. Thats what I get from your sitch.
You can try to GAL, but H tags along, involves himself ... does not seem like anything he is doing is setting you off, just his mere breathing, his existence in your life ... why?> Because the little things have added up and you have started to resent him.
This is where you are now, this is not where you need to live, this is not how you need to be, this is not who you want to be is it? One of the lessons DB/DR teaches ... you control you, you can not stop your H from breathing, nor anything he does .. you CAN change how it effects you. There is a secret .... no one can make YOU happy but YOU.
Start thinking positive, do small things that make you feel good about you. Take charge of your life and your thoughts, own it. focus on that. I think you see D as the out .... sure .. it may be easier just to sign docs and part ... that still will not make YOU happy, you might feel less pressure for a bit .. then the new neighbors will irritate you, your H having the kids enjoying things will bother you. The D is a fantasy you have allowed to think about because its an escape ... requires no work to daydream about that life.
Work on YOU, I think your unhappiness is more to do with YOU than it has to do with your M, and I think once you start making these changes, putting in the work you would be surprised at how much happier you can be regardless of your H.
