Confused & mix messages part 2

[Cherry]

Thanks heart, I'm really grateful for the advise. I guess thanking him for the little things might seem like not much to me but might to him. I have thanked him in the past and he's said "you don't need to thank me he's my son". But I'll continue to do so.
Is it okay to still make conversation by asking him about his job. About the time he started acting strange and distant is the same time he got a new job which is a lot more responsibility. For the first time in ages the other day he started telling me about his work.
I feel like with sandi2's advise and reading more of DR I am starting to get a plan in my mind. I'm setting myself goals and tasks and I keep reminding myself that I have no control over him. I can control me.
He came back like 24 hours after leaving last night. Which in a way I was at peace with. I can't control that, and wondering what he is doing is only going to upset me. So I carried on about my day. I started to make dinner and I got a message asking if there's anything to eat at home. I said I was cooking. I had it in my mind I won't wait for him- we eat the same time every night. So if he wasn't home then I would put it in the fridge.
He came home we ate together, have a bit of polite conversation. He seemed concerned that I was unwell. I said I would be fine. I'm not reading into the concern. Then he goes to his room and I go to mine. It does break my heart, and I hope this is not the way it's always going to be. I do long for him back because when he is himself he is an amazing sweet man. It is like this guy is my h's evil twin or something.
But at the end of the day, it is sinking in that I have no control whatsoever over anyone bar myself. So I've gotta become me again. And I miss being me, I was easy going and free spirited. I don't know where or how I became this insecure, shy dependant girl. I feel I have woken up from something!