Alpha - the future is now!

[alpha99]

I've just called her back.

It was as expected, nothing 'important' - she wanted me to mind the kids as she need to go to work.

Her parents go out on a Sunday evening for a few drinks to the local social club. They hadn't realised that W was at work this afternoon. They won't mind the kids because they say they are not her babysitters. W was asking if I could mind them and acknowledged that it was last minute. I said 'yeah, it is last minute. I am not an on call babysitter. This is the exact reason why we need to have proper days in place so that this kind of thing doesn't happen.

W agreed. Then she tried to guilt me into taking the kids by saying S6 wants to spend time with his daddy. He has been asking to spend time with with you (me) again. I was having none of it. I won't be guilt tripped into minding them just to suit my W's work schedule. She complained that she earns double time on a Sunday and would have to call in and say she couldn't come.

**She has just called back as I wrote the last paragraph. She started off in a overly nice manner with an apology:

W:I'm sorry for calling last minute. It was wrong of me to do that. We do need to sort out proper days etc so we each have the kids. Can you send me a message later about what days you want to have them?

M: Yeah, sure, no problem. That will stop this kind of thing happening again.

W: Yeah, it's just...I'm struggling now. I have to go to work and no one can mind the kids. I'm on double time today. Can't you just have them and help me out? I'll pick them up later and everything.

M: So I'll send you a message about what days I would like to have them later on then and we'll sort that out.

(W getting angry now)

W: Why are you ignoring me?

M: I'm not ignoring you, I heard what you said. I just can't take the kids now as it's too short notice. We need to sort out the days we're each going to have them.

(W becoming angrier and sarcastic)

W: Yeah, right, hmmm OK, well thanks, grrr, bye.

M: See you, bye now.

It felt good to be in control for a few moments. I'd normally jump at any opportunity to spend time with my kids but I guess the longer I am the on call babysitter the less need there is for my W to decide on any sort of child sharing arrangement.

This might be the first time that she is starting to feel the consequences of her actions - I hope so anyway