Sorry about the cold. Weather wise its properly miserable here in the west Midlands today so I don't think anyone would sensibly go out.
Now you probably already know what I'm going to say but I'm going to anyway (and so you're clear on tone this is all said with genuine care, respect and good wishes and really should be said over a beer down the pub)
Stop beating yourself up with your own expectations!!!!!!!
Let's say you had a relative who offered to pay for YOU to take S on holiday (and by the way that sane relative hated your W) would you involve your wife in the planning or invite her along given your current circumstances?
It like your wife's comments about not ruling you out has taken an egg whisk your thinking and superglued back the bit of detachment. I betcha Mr fixit is screaming that he should be let out because then all will be better if you just let him fix it.
If your thinking this way then definitely post about it and I know there is a big difference to the feelings we post and the behaviour we show. But acting as if is still an act and even the best actors slip especially if the underlying feeling is a long way from the act.
Have a good day edz and enjoy our summertime
Both mid 30s, 2 young kids BD 7sep14 XW moved on long ago, now living with OM1 D paperwork in progress
