I think you went down a slippery slope with mixing personal/professional life.....

And honestly I don't think sending that woman a no contact letter will have ANY impact on your wife in any way.

Me: 35 husband:39
Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage
Twins 5 (boy/girl)
Daughter 3
Affair bomb 2/27/14
He moved in with ow 3/13/14
OW kicked him out 6/15/14
4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction