Newbie seeking some experienced advice

[nick77]

Hi HS and thank you for your reply and insight. We didn't plan on getting pregnant. She was just back from college and we reunited and one thing led to another and she was pregnant. She was still living with her parents and had just just started her new career. She didn't want to move in together right away because she wanted to save to buy a house. I wanted to live together. We discussed getting married but decided together to wait awhile. I don't recall exactly why but I think we both wanted to make sure it's what we wanted to do. We stayed together and things were pretty good and after 2 years we had enough to buy our house and that's when we moved in together.
Shortly after I got a promotion at work and started working 6 and 7 days a week 10 to 12 hours a day. Her career was sliding due to the economy. We still discussed getting married but kept putting it off. Finally when my son was about 4 I proposed and she accepted. We were planning to marry later that year when she got laid off. So we decided to marry right away so I could get he on my medical coverage. Everything seemed great but in hindsight I see that I was being an absent husband. It wasn't intentional I just worked a lot. I was trying to do the best I could and what I thought was right.
Fast forward 2 years and she landed a great job in a whole new field and it was an extremely hard and stressful transition for her. I thought I was doing my part at the time to help but now I know I wasnt. I was exhausted all the time and didn't want to do anything but relax.
We started fighting all a lot and finally she let me have it and told me how bad of a husband I've been with the neglect and absenteeism and all. Naturally I wasn't hearing any of it and became defensive only making matters worse. We held on awhile and separated recently.
I appreciate your reply but I never was waiting for something better to come along. I love my wife and always have. I made a ton of mistakes but I never meant to be hurtful or push her away. I have always wanted her and her only.