I'm also in the situation where my W avoids full transparency, but for some reason we have a better R now than we had pre A. Acting nice and all, but I feel her heart isn't in it. She still has contact with OM and possibly seeing him.
At least in your case the A has stopped. Maybe if you have enough patience, everything will work out for you. But I understand that staying in limbo is hell.
M 30 W 31 S8 and S6 M 7 T 13 D-Day Mid December 2014 EA/PA confirmed end of December 2014
Help needed: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2550514#Post2550514