Thank you everyone ... and yeah was a busy 'big talk' kind of weekend. That being said I am still not really buying it, still going on about my life as I have because I know I can not jump in until I SEE some things with her. Yesterday was a typical work day .. no real interaction with W until after I picked S up and she lets me know she forgot she had a meeting this morning and needed me to take S to school. Told me she would call later as she was working late. I instantly realized as detached as I thought I was I had red flag syndrome thinking ... ok is she lying? Truth? .. admitedly spun a bit but quickly stopped myself.
S called, she sounded sad again on the phone, but as usual I jumped in the shower. She called after S was out and the conversation was very mellow, very guarded. She called me out on being guarded I agreed ... we started to open up a bit and she suggested we try MC. Trigger for me as last time we 'tried' that she was full on with OM, so I told her I would like to do that once she proves OM is gone. And monster arrived, I took the spew but held my ground, several times I told her she can do as she wishes just as she has but I would not budge on this even if it meant our M was over I even asked her to put herself in my spot and she agreed. During this I realized she is not ready to make it right .. the spew that followed was old stuff, like she is looking for a reason we will not work... more important I realized I do not want to be with someone always looking for the upper hand, or looking for the door.
Dropped off S this morning and she hugged me, told me she was PMSing ... seems my tracker is a bit off ... not sure if this has anything to do with last weekends plea for our marriage from her ... again like all things time will tell.
