For the Newcomer LBH who has a wayward wife Part 2

[sandi2]

So when we say the WAS follows a "script", what is that supposed to mean to the LBS?

Well first, let me say that when we say it, we don't intend for it to sound like a flippant answer. And that we usually refer to a "verbal" script coming from the WAS.

In the beginning of his stitch, the LBH is in panic mode and when his W throws the usual WW statements at him......it scares him b/c he believe every word that comes out of her mouth. He is not aware this is almost protocol for her. He doesn't realize almost every WW has said practically the same words to her H. We are informing him that all she is saying is common and for him not to react out of fear but to get a grip and focus on what he needs to do.......instead of being slain by her words.

It usually surprises newcomers to read other threads and see another man's W saying almost word for word his own W said. Some men have said, "Wow, it really is like they all read from the same script".

I don't think the intentions are for the LBH to find comfort in hearing it is all script. Nor does it necessarily diminish those words she spoke. Telling him it is script is simply more information, such as the 37 rules, the boundary examples, detaching, etc.

The point here is not whether or not it is heartfelt by the WW. The degree of emotions or her sincerity does not change the fact that she is still saying the same stuff as every other WW has said. A person can be sincere, but be sincerely wrong.