Without complete NC and a rock-solid transparency plan (and no, none are 100% foolproof, but you're going for that 95%) you're asking for trouble.
Since you're well familiar with AA (I am too), you understand the concept: separate the addict from the source of their addiction.
100% NC and full transparency is for BOTH the formerly wayward spouse AND the betrayed spouse. Not all infidelity recidivism is of the "not willing" variety -- some is "not able." You can have a perfectly well-intentioned spouse, but without a strong NC and transparency plan around them, they may soon find themselves unable to stay away from their affair partner.
