Hey NH I know my D15 is has issues with how W & I are acting and we are usually very quiet and only talk when they are securely away, but the kids might hear and know more than I think. It is understandable that they are scared. I think that mine has no idea what's coming, S17 might guess it and S20 has asked me to divorce her. The only thing that I have told them on my own is that I am sorry for how this affects them. They want us to be happy - and I think they understand if that means apart (as sad as that sounds) They are used to this with their friends divorced parents.
I think that sometimes teenage girls feel that if you hate someone, you leave them. she sees you not leaving your W, she sees you staying and trying.
Keep it up. I really wish you the best.
Me-45 W-44 S21, S18, D15 T-27, M-21 BD Jan 2014 PA revealed March 2014 In-house separation - April 2015 I filed - Aug 2015 She moved out Oct 2015