Wife Walked Away 10 Weeks Ago

[Bob723]

mahhhty, I'm still trying to figure out of to use the Quote function. For example, grab just your quotes from the last posting. it seemed to take both mine and yours. LOL

GOOD! Keep doing these things. Get out of the house and Get A Life (GAL)! Be active in your environment and live every moment!

Me: Thank you!

You really need to read the LBH Thread, and study it. I don't fully understand from the text what she would like you to do. Can you elaborate?

Me: I will read both LBH threads. Thank you so much again for pointing her threads out. I am not fully sure myself. I will add on to the post later when I either get a reply from her or I'll give you my best guess. i do have some idea. I can see why you are not sure what she's asking.

You need to stop saying it. You need to act like you have seen the light and understand that leaving her and moving on is the only way. You have to stop being her safety net. She wanted freedom, that comes with a reality check, that she got rid of you. Again read the LBH thread and Sandi's thirty something rules.

Me: I agree! Stop saying "take care of yourself." I thought adding that once in a while would lighten the mood. I see where saying that lends itself to my W thinking that I still care deeply about her. That doesn't show I'm moving on. And I have to change my way of thinking. My therapist is working with me on that. Very good catch, my friend!

It does hurt. And it [censored]. She does want freedom, she is fueled by resentment, rebellion and disrespect. She resents you, doesn't respect you, and is in the middle of rebelling against you. <--All covered in the LBH thread. It is possible that she changes her mind. However, you can't bank on that. Nor can you continue to think the way you have been... "We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them." - ALBERT EINSTEIN

Me: Again, I agree! I can't presume that she will change her mind. I need to move on for my own mental health.

Yes you have the gift of time, which you need to take advantage of. Did she knowingly give you that gift, probably not. She is probably convinced she wants a D and therefore is doing this from a place of a wayward wife.

Me: We all can only guess, but most likely you are correct again. I just wondered if it's something others had heard before from their WAS.

Stop looking for validation from family members. Also do not try to win them over. They aren't in the relationship. As a father you need to reinforce their relationship with their mother. Take the high road here.

Me: Sorry, I guess I wasn't clear enough. These are my children from a previous marriage and it is unsolicited advice from them. They think I should give up on the marriage because they feel she took advantage of me. They do say they understand why I'd like to reconcile. So, I wasn't looking for validation from anyone, they offered their opinions on their own.

Wow, you are so wonderful to follow-up again with both your posts.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Bob