Uno

[AJM]

I just dont know how HE could find happiness that way, and it seems impossible for me to wish him well like this. I just can't.

It's possible he can't either, Mighty. And it's ok if you can't. Apathy will be perfectly acceptable later as well.

Something to think about. There's a big difference between wishing somebody to be punished (to see they were wrong?) and understanding what they did to you was wrong. You know it was wrong, but should you be the one to punish him? Do you want to stick around and see that? Seems like a lot of energy for almost no payoff.

The thing is, he hurt you. There's pain associated with that. But do you have to return that? Is that who you are? Somebody who needs to balance the books? I haven't seen that in you so far. I see somebody who was hurt deeply and wasn't given a choice. Somebody who was vilified and then hurt again by somebody she trusted.

I don't see somebody who would be happy and joyful in her own life if she balanced the books with him. I'm not saying you should let him continue to hurt you nor am I saying to just forget it. I am suggesting to accept the difference between what he did and how his life will play out. I don't think you want to be around for the remainder of the show. It'll get in the way of your own pursuit of joy (happiness is a dog's emotion; joy is something else altogether in my opinion. A happy person can't be happy when things are difficult. A joyful person can experience much more of life and remain joyful.)

What I took from Bea's post? Let him pursue his life in the way he chooses. What happens happens. I can't see how it's a good thing either, but I don't see through his eyes and I don't have to live that life. I have joy to seek...

Peace,
AJ