I am so sorry that you are really struggling emotionally at this stage.
Fer God's sake, you've got to FORCE yourself to get out of the house. Heck, people have offered a get-together to you twice and you've turned down. Not good.
There are many things you can do for free and gets you out of the house:
1) Volunteer at the local hospital and read stories to ill children. One poster posted not too long ago that he volunteers at the maternity ward to just hold the babies because they need someone to rotate to hold the babies 2) Volunteer at the local animal shelter (you can help cleaning out and changing their bowls, etc) 3) Join a hiking club through Meet-Up
Your sons are not holding you back. You are holding YOURSELF back.
Stop being so afraid of the world. There are TONS of good people out there. GET OUT OF THE HOUSE.
