The feeling you have is not easy at all to bear specially when there are children involved, but having said that you should focus as you said to improve yourself and do the best for your children. I have to say that you should not direct your anger or negative feelings towards your wife because she's the woman you had 2 children with and you just need to let the course run its course.
Continue to pursue a parental plan, focus on you and your children, and hopefully with time there will be major positive for you.
