Thanks Cathy - I feel somewhat better hearing what is "normal" in this situation.
Ok, some questions for those who dealt with an OP - has anyone out there ever worked with the OW? (or OP?). I just saw the OW in the restroom, and I feel all shakey inside. None of us are going anywhere for awhile (e.g., at least one year), so I have to find a way to work with this. Part of me keeps thinking, "this is not workable." I am not sure if she knows that I know, but I am beginning to think my bx. has made it obvious. I made an effort to act normal around her so things would not look odd to outsiders, but our interaction pattern has changed a lot, we used to talk etc.
Also, has anyone been somewhat fearful of the OP? I mentioned before that I am anxious person normally, so that is part of it, but I am afraid that she will escalate and do something to harm me, my H., or the baby the more he pulls away from her. Is this crazy thinking? Any thought stopping techniques work for anyone other than the stop sign? (stop sign is not doing it for me.) One thing is, everytime I see her, I become angry at H. again for choosing an OP who works with us. She is also a doctoral student, NOT one of ours...he is not evaluating her, but nonetheless there are power issues here that concern me.
Let me finish with two positives:
1. H. sent me two warm emails after our call today. He used a pet name for me that he has not used in awhile, which is a plus. And said ILY.
2. I have been able to focus on work for the first time in 8 weeks. Part of my goal is to get back to what I love doing, and I love doing research, and have not been able to think. Today I did some research-related activity for a few hours.
3. I am going to hot yoga tonight, and went last night as well. Also have very cool new yoga outfit
