There is no right time to tell the children that a spouse wants to separate/divorce and move out of the home. Your h actually threw himself under the bus when he decided on what HE wants for HIS future.
If he moves many miles away, so be it. It will be up to him to figure out how to work out visitation, etc., w/the children. He could do it via Skype, webcam, etc. and yes, there are weeks and months when the children are out of school that they could either be w/him or he could come to your area to visit w/them. Where there is a will, there is a way to do things.
As for him being out the area, this may be a good thing for peace and quiet and yes, it will help you find your footing once again. You can do this. You've been doing it since he flipped years ago.
BTW, do not feel guilty by telling the children. It is best to have this discussion w/both parents present. They needed to be told because you don't know when he's going to decide to fly the coop.
Take care of yourself. Keep the focus on you, your children and your finances.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
