She has to actually make some effort, herself, in this MR. It's as if she is just there pondering over the same old issues and looking at you to "prove" to her this can work. You must feel like a defense attorney at trial.
Sandi, you nailed it again. From our R talk this morning (I shut it down eventually)
W: "How am I ever going to trust you again?" (In referring to my mishandling of my parents).
All she cares about is what I'm doing to make her feel better and she's angry because nothing I do or say works. I'm exhausted.
Rzr, not trying to further kick you when you're down, but I don't think I've EVER seen a successful reconciliation after an affair where the formerly cheating spouse didn't do the overwhelming majority of the "work," at least in the initial few months. While the WORDS "I'm sorry" don't always come forth, the EFFORT and ATTITUDE has to be one of contrition and of "doing whatever it takes" to try and reconcile the marriage, even if the feelings aren't quite there yet (and they won't be, as you know by now).
I honestly don't see that from your wife, and I haven't -- at any stage of this.
