Moved too fast? Now what?

[PatientMan]

To the question at the end of your first paragraph: yes!

Remember, one tactic you can choose to use is 'delay'. There is nothing wrong with telling her the truth by saying,

"You know what? There are a lot of really big decisions in here and I need some time to think it through." If she presses: "I will not be rushed on this. If you want me to be cooperative, allow me time to process this information."

Regarding your response, remember: less is more. You don't have to share all of your feelings with her; it is, in fact, counterproductive to do so. Something like:

"Hello,

This looks fine. I'm glad we were able to work through most of the details last night - not much left to do now.

I'm sorry you are hurting. I hope you are able to sort through the causes of your pain and I'm sorry for anything I've done to contribute.

Thank you for acknowledging my perspective. I can't pretend to have any interest in wanting to be friends or have a good relationship with you when we are divorced. I think the affair has blocked us from having any chance of attempting to work on our issues and I'm sad the girls are caught in the middle. But the girls are strong and I know they'll be fine. I also have no desire in fighting with you or being uncivil. I'm just not that way, and if you have doubts I'm confident my actions will reflect otherwise.

Good luck to you (STBX). Thanks for getting everything in order.

P.s. I will pick up the girls, no problem.

Bing"

All the best!

-PM