I have not formally met with an attorney but have spoken to a family friend who is a family law specialist. She has offered guidance in terms of reasonable amounts etc. Legally.
I can tell after tonights conversation it was a definite mixed message... She started on finances and then moved away. She was very curious about the other woman and tried to probe about all kinds of things I was unto in my life.
She then returned to general negativity and guilt tripping to try and make me feel bad. Before finally returning to the financial side of things. I just stuck with "hmm let me think about that" and " yes thats interesting" throughout.
I did though get her to agree (here in the UK lawyers are an expensive accessory not wait so much the commission based norm as the US) that perhaps before either of us agreed to anything we should go and speak to an independent legal advisor. A service that is offered free here in the UK, so we both know where we stand legally before making any decisions.
Having taken legal advice I know that she has un-realistic expectations of what she would receive, something not helped by "friends" offering school yard legal advice etc...
Stil despite that I took today as a positive.
It is one of the first times, she has spoken to me and I have been aware that she is trying to push my buttons and found it easy to not react.
Equally at no time did I agree or back down.
So baby steps, but I can see it was a struggle for her and really the whole financial thing was a smokescreen for her to talk to me about our R...
T:13 yrs M:11 Me: 36 Her: 33 Living apart Her having affair She Asked me to move out 26th jan 2015 3 kids D13 S10 D10 D not mentioned yet
