Need Help 2

[errod]

I have not heard from W since dropping off D14 yesterday at 5. That is a long stretch.

If you are still initiating calls to your W, make it your goal to stop calling. Every time you initiate a contact, it is pursuing her and that is totally opposite from what works with a WW.

I want to refer to something you said to your D14 about as long as you had her, everything would be okay. I'm not taking what you said the wrong way, but let me say something here. Be careful not to put too much emotional pressure on your D14, where your welfare is concerned. She is angry at her mom and taking your side, which is understandable, and even normal. However, she does not need to feel that she should take your W's place, emotionally speaking. Young teenage girls in the same shoes as your D can become protective about their dad and if he leans on her too much, it could prove to be a burden too heavy. In other words, if she should begin giving up part of her activities to stay with dad, let it be a flag getting your attention. And, she probably wouldn't tell you she sacrificed being with friends or doing whatever she normally would have been doing, but that is why you need to work at GAL in addition to the time spent with her.

You expressed earlier that you are located in an area that is difficult for you to adapt. Just saying, it could be very easy to look at D14 for all your GAL time.

Sandi2 Everything you said about D14 made perfect sense. I can see where what I wrote has you concerned. The reason we are so close is because I always allow her to have her own life. She knows I am always here for her but I will never hold her back from doing something. She said to me today now keep in mind this is in teen language. "you are going to be jaunt" I said what does that mean she said now that you took your ring off all the girls are going to be looking at you. She said all my friends moms comment about you.

One thing that held me back for GAL is my W is the one that worked and brought in an income. I was afraid to go out and spend her money. Well my attorney clarified that it is not her money and I can't forget all the things I did behind the seens that have a monetary value. So hopefully now I will start doing things and not feeling guilty.

I will repeat myself I do not want this D. But I can not force someone to stay with me either. My attorney commented on that today. He said he could tell in my body language and responses that I am not ready to close the door. I told I am here only to protect myself.

I don't usually send the first text or call.