MLC W, Part 8

[AJM]

I took the same path as Kat. Kept so busy I couldn't see straight while I processed. It was therapeutic, but getting off that train has proven a challenge. At least gracefully

It's nothing I can deal with right now

Um, when then? The thing is, time waits for nobody. Your kids are looking to you to see how to handle things. They obviously have their opinion about their mom. One that you may not have played into, but they have one nonetheless. My guess is its not favorable. Be on the lookout for some signs of bitterness from them. They'll need you to help them process it.

I was reading another news nugget that made me think of you, Wet. The story of Sir Paul McCartney's ex. She's a piece of work to say the least. It also reminded me of my pastor friend who's wife recently did the same thing claiming similar reasons. There were a few others that came to mind.

It made me think about the differences between the way the world thinks and the way a Christian should think. We live in the world, so it's not easy. There are those that think God has changed his mind about things. Or that the world isn't the same place. I smiled when I got to that place, Wet. Know why? Because it reminded me how small I really am. It reminded me that although I have every reason to be bitter and callous, I fought against that and feel like I am well on my way to not being that bitter person. I could easily be that. There's plenty of fodder for that cannon. Even all these years later.

What I struggled with is the old vs. the new ways. The old ways - stone the person that did that. Both of them. The new? Forgive them. I certainly couldn't cast that first stone, my friend. Not for the same reasons, but just the same.

Don't wait to deal with things, Wet. Don't wait to live your life. At least, don't wait for anything other than figuring it out. You are trying to change things. Keep trying. Some will work out and some won't, but keep trying. And don't wait to be a father and deal with things with your kids if you need to. The world will keep spinning and your family needs you to be that guide. I think you're doing that, but trying to encourage you to continue.

You are slowly becoming yourself again. Keep at it. It takes far longer than you'd like, I know. You are respecting her wishes to walk away and live her life the way she thinks she should. That's what you should do, amigo. There is no reason to be bitter although there are times to be angry (and measured) if the situation warrants it.

Don't wait, Wet. Keep doing what you're doing and keep an eye out for the times with the kids when you need to act or otherwise guide.

And keep in mind, it's not that good things will happen to you like there's a magical fairy repaying you for kindness. But you do it because that's who you are. Keep that in focus and you'll be more than OK in all aspects.

Don't get me wrong. I disagree with you waiting for your W. I do respect your choice but I think there's more to the reason than you sometimes admit. I suspect some of it is because you are not sure where or what to do otherwise. But I'm not walking in your shoes this time around. That's for you to decide how to do that and forgive her. And you'll do what you do in your time.

Food for thought.

AJ