Some WW's apologize and some make excuses, and thinks he should be able to forgive easily and make no big deal out of it. Others point blame at the H, whether he had anything to do with the problem, or not.
Sandi, Starsky talks about 4 stages of remorse in a WW (wish I could find the thread). My W could never make it past stage 3: I know I did something wrong, but what's the big deal? Why can't you just get over it. She progressed from there to putting all the blame on me. My question, and I think this will be helpful to koalada, is what, if anything, to do about it? Is this a time for setting boundaries? If this is an angry person, how do you set boundaries? My W is not angry; just passive and avoidant. I think Koalada is up against something worse. Any practical advice? RAI
