It's painful to read what you are going through as I basically went through the exact same conversation with my WW and the forum. You can see the exchange between myself and Starsky in my previous threads. I was using my boundaries as a means to control my WW's behavior. Which is by definition, not a boundary and totally ineffective. Not only for my WW but for my own self esteem.
I'm going to go out on a limb, but I don't believe you are ready (Yet!) to implement what the real consequence we know to be is. To leave our WW's to protect our boundaries. Maybe at this point, it may not be possible.
I truly believe that we must first free ourselves of the dependance that we are responsible for developing. Only than are we ready to deal in "consequences".
In the meantime,
GAL: Get your life and self respect back. Detach: Protect yourself from your WW's hurtful behaviors. 180: Identify what you have done in the past and accept that we contributed fully to this situation. Next, become a better man.
Questions I have.
What are you doing to protect yourself from all this craziness? Which ones are aimed at her behavior and which are aimed at yours?
What are you doing now to make yourself a better man. Which of those are aimed at pleasing your WW and which ones are just for you?
