Just a quick update: If you've followed my sitch you know that the parenting schedule has always been a bit of a sore spot. During our M, I was always the 'default' caregiver. (H could simply say, "I'm going to be a bit late tonight", and while he didn't do this *too* often, it was definitely different than my schedule or ability to make last minute plans. I take a lot of responsibility-- as a working mom, I was reluctant to have my daughter stay with a sitter more than she already was. So, I hardly ever went out.
But on top of that, if there was ever a conflict between me and H, I was almost always the one to back out of my plans... and then, of course, resent him for it.
Anyway, there is some good news to share: H has requested two schedule changes recently-- both of which I was unavailable to help him with. So, he had to find a babysitter and figure out a way to make it work if he wanted to keep his plans. (You know, the thing that I always have to do, since he's often unavailable to make changes for me!) I didn't feel guilty, or debate whether I should try to accomodate him. I just said, "So sorry, I'm not available at that time."
If he chooses to hate or resent me for it...not my problem.
I'm feeling so much stronger and freer than before.
