hold on! - 8

[u-turn]

Thanks Toots - I don't feel any remorse from her.

I am asking myself if I am being too impatient now - pushing too hard, but as it has gone, if I don't apply some pressure, it all just ends up back under the carpet. So I feel like I do need to at least get her idea of how to draw that line and show me that line.

on another note:

S20 stopped by today out of the blue. I haven't seen him since before Christmas as he has removed himself from our lives as he says. My expectations rose when I heard him, has he come home to talk? Nah. just picking up his W2 forms for taxes. Said hi to D15 and talked to her for a minute. He did give me a hug on his way out. He teared up and left. He is welcome to come home, but it is his move. He did drop out of college (temporarily), and is living with his girl friend and her family.

I don't know why it is easier for me to detach from him and say that he is on his own journey and has to discover things for himself. I think we raised him to succeed in life. This has been very difficult on him.

I have a hard time applying this same detachment to W and her journey.

another reminder of how much life has changed in the last 12 months. There are times when I just want to walk away.