My Wife Wants to Work on Things - Any Advice?

[Sherman333]

Well tonight was crazy. My STBX is unhinged even more than usual. I'm filing on Monday.

She met us at toys-r-us for my son to pick out legos. I stayed cordial and polite, but did not engage her much.

We go the legos and went home, had dinner, and I started helping my S7 put together the legos after we ate. My wife stated that legos are more of a guy thing and that she was glad I was helping him. I told her I understand and that I only do legos because my son likes them. She took this as me insulting her as I was the better parent. I stated no that rather it was me telling her I understood that she didn't like legos.

She kept up badgering me a little and I ignored it.

So she switched tactics to talking about spending a couple of hundred on clothes shoes (on top of everything we recently bought). We have the Disney trip coming up and I objected. This of course turned into a bit more of a heated discussion and I even suggested we consider separate accounts, especially if we're heading towards divorce.

She absolutely flipped. Spewing in front of my son about how I owed her, how horrible I was, etc. I retreated to upstairs. She followed. So I went downstairs, she followed. So I left. She called me with my son crying about how we weren't doing legos. She then proceeded to attack me and my son at the same time making him cry more. All the while stating it was my fault and that I was making this happen. I turned the truck around, got my son, and we're at my brother-in-laws.

In the course of discussions with them about things, it comes out that on my wife's side of the family, Bipolar is pretty common. This would explain a TON. I feel like an idiot for not seeing it a little more clear and annoyed that it wasn't mentioned before. For a lot of the marriage now they thought she'd been able to control it... Shes always been a little bit of a stepford wife having 2 faces. One at home that's mean/nasty and one in public that shows nothing is wrong. Looking back, she was ok for about 4 or so years and the last 3 have been getting gradually worse to where we're at. A slow progression over time and I tried to keep her appeased.

Anyway, the fact that she was tormenting my son took away any doubt in my mind about filing. But she's talking about burying me and making sure to beggar me with child support and making my son pay to make sure I hurt. She made a direct threat to him.