Moved too fast? Now what?

[Bing]

I asked my wife to move out of our house. I told her I was sick of her hurting me. I have dug myself a hole with reasoning and pleading and this is probably just more of the same emotional behavior from me.

Wife has carried on with OM and continues to do so every day. It is a long distance relationship so the EA remains as torrid as ever. They seem blissfully stuck in the honeymoon phase. She started talking about what we would do with the kids if she moved 4 hours away, saying she would have them most of the time and I would get 1 weekend a month and summers, and coincidentally 4 hours away is the distance to OM. And it pushed me over the edge... yet again.

She has only been in this man's physical presence one time when she lied to me and took a flight to spend a weekend with him. How can she be so emotionally involved with him? I have found evidence of highly sexual phone conversations, text messages and photos she is sending him. Things she never did with me. I am jealous of how adventurous she has become for this man. We have not ML for about two months.

My wife has nothing but sympathetic influences in her ear - OM, her parents, her friends, her therapist. I've only tried to do right by her and provide for her and our kids. But somehow I am made out to be the bad guy in all this and everyone she knows is validating it.

I see no path to reconciliation for us. She's told me verbatim many of the quotes from DR WW anecdotes. I never loved you. We got married for the wrong reasons. I'm not happy and I deserve more than mediocre happiness. I don't want to be with you.

Our history is completely rewritten and she is convinced we never shared a single happy moment together.

We are well on our way to changing the lives of our two baby girls, blowing up six years together, the life we built and the future we were building, all of our family and friend connections, all of it. Over a man she has known for less than a year and seen only once.

She is completely detached from me. I should take notes from her. NOBODY is better at detaching than a WW.

Maybe it's not too late for me to turn it around and become the man only a fool would leave. Maybe I can attract my wife to my picnic patiently over time. But I have struggled with this from the start. How do I realize my full potential when i walk around every day in a constant state of grief and depression? How do you just snap out of that and act cheerful and detached? I truthfully haven't been able to do this even once.

What kind of man was I before I met my wife? The man she was attracted to when we first met?

I don't remember. I have no idea who I am anymore.