Need Help!!!

[errod]

Patient Man

I am way to emotionally involved. As far as detaching I just can't find the right balance. When I don't initiate contact with her is usually when she makes her next big move. Tuesday I said I had not contact. Well Tuesday is the day she signed the divorce papers. Just using that as an example.

Is her infidelity a deal breaker for me? Emotional no Physical it depends.

I am not looking for a reason to be done I am just setting a boundary that would be going to far. I am far from done in this. I am hurt and frightened and scared to death to lose my W and BF. I am being honest because it is the only way you can help me, but my world is spinning out of control right now.

No I am not acting honorably I am acting like a scared POS. At least I can imagine that is how she sees me.

I have read your links and I do come up with a game plan. But every time I feel I am focused she hits me with something new.

I am not emotionally healthy enough to handle it. I just want the truth for closure.

I am going to see her in a little while to take my D14 to get clothes from her. Do I just drop the entire snooping thing forever and not apologize anymore?

I will probably get blasted for analyzing again. But W told me she couldn't function the rest of the day at work after I left because I left my wedding ring and house key on the back desk when I left and did not say bye to her. She also said she didn't sleep at all. Because of the way I acted. That must show there is either something left. Or she is nervous because I caught her.

She did hand me back my wedding ring when we met for dinner last night. Which I put right back on. But she told me she doesn't trust me enough to get the house key back, I would have to earn it back. By the way I have another set.

Last thing when we talked about the attorneys and all that today. She told me I can either get an attorney of my own or we can just go to mediation. What is the best choice if you are trying to save your marriage? My marriage comes first but I don't want to get wiped clean either.