I'm sorry to hear that you are now getting ready to start chemo. You are going to have to find a way to get rid of that stress because it's not going to help you fight your cancer. Yes, I know it's awful the way your h is behaving, but you've got to be strong, not only for yourself, but for your children and yes, to fight for your life.

Do you have friends/family that will be able to assist you as you go thru the chemo? It's going to take a lot out of you and you will need someone there to help you and the children.

I'm glad you've got the children signed up to see a therapist. What about you? Are you seeing anyone?

Please, please take care of yourself. Your h is gone, out to lunch, and yes, very, very selfish right now. I am so sorry that he's not there supporting you and your children.

I am keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. Prayers are a powerful tool and I'm sure everyone here will pray as well.

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.