All of that is really interesting... Especially to consider from the viewpoint of my R/M which is same-sex... In our case, my W has always taken on the provider role (she is not masculine by any means -- but has always taken on the breadwinner/provider role), but it is now clear to me that there has been some built-up resentment over me not making more than I do.
I do wonder how or if the dynamics would shift when I do get back to being employed full-time -- especially if, based on my experience yesterday in the interview, I end up in a higher-level, fairly well-paying (for public education) job. It may really be too late for it to make a difference right now b/c W is neck-deep in Replay and very happy to remain there as far as any of us can tell. Whether she comes out of the fog and begins to progress through the tunnel or not, at least I'll be doing much better financially than I ever have on my own and that is important regardless of the final outcome.
I was also curious about your take on that with the same sex marriage but reading your sitch I though there could be a possibility of some resentment ... honestly I think that is only natural and really is a non sex issue, I think it just feeds into the 'providers' ego to be honest. Add in some MLC and that just adds to the justification factor ya know?
Like you I wonder .. ok .. get out of the tunnels, fog lifts and who knows how the MLCr will view the LBS, the important thing is ... the job adds to ones confidence, gives independence, makes us the ruler of our own domain if you will ... all these traits add to attraction regardless of who might come courting is not really important ... its OUR journey and this makes US better.
