Barrybran - A Year On

[Barrybran]

Yesterday was a frustrating day. I had planned my day, let my SIL know what I had planned and got into my study. 15 minutes before I left for work, my wife messages me to tell me what she was doing, plans that were not discussed and interfered with my plans. As I was going to work, I spent the next five hours on and off debating via text message and getting nowhere. She felt that because I had the kids with me for ten days last week, she should have the kids all of this week. I understand her logic however she was supposed to leave town on Sunday. I have accommodated her presence and asked for the only two afternoons I had free, yesterday and today, to spend with the kids. This was a mission. Long story short, there was an error with the roster, I relented as I had to stay an extra hour and two of the kids chose to stay with me after work anyway.

My wife didn't seem to understand my frustration about dropping plans on me without prior discussion. She would be livid if I did the same to her and I told her this. My son had a presentation at his school assembly today so we both went (in separate cars; I was at work) and after school, the two that stayed with me yesterday chose to go with my wife today. I didn't argue the point as the kids chose and I want that flexibility when my wife moves back to town, provided it doesn't interfere with existing plans or budgets (dinner planning, etc.).

When my wife returned with the kids, she made more negative comments about the yard, asked my son to tidy up some rubbish and told me that the house smelled. Granted, the yard is a mess. I live on a half acre block and it's just me so I put more effort into the inside and the kids and put away half an hour when I can to do yard work. Telling me the house smelled cut me pretty deeply as I bust my butt to provide for the kids and keep the house in good order and its still not good enough. It means I'll have to put even more effort into cleaning and my time is already stretched as it is.

Finally, my wife told me she was going to claim a government payment that is currently being paid to myself and can only be paid to one parent. Her idea is that she will claim the payment for our two elder kids, who aren't biologically mine, and I claim for the youngest, who is. I crunched the numbers and while its feasible, it doesn't sit well with me. I'll have a chance to call the relevant department tomorrow to seek clarification.