Devotion To A Dream

[phunguy]

Tonight was not a good night W wanted to and did talk about D. She said she doesn't want to make me hurt anymore. I told her I've accepted what's happened and am prepared to go forward with or without her. That I'm not going to sit around and wait for her. She said that made her feel good. Like she's somehow waiting for me to be ok with this? I told her that was her just being selfish to make herself feel good. That this was all her that this is all about her. She said we could work on the papers this weekend. I told her I could have the papers drawn up and we could review them or she could and then we'd just have to go file them. She said she would be fine with that and then she went outside and I could see her crying while she smoked her cig. Another thing I've come to realize is that since I quit smoking a year ago we stopped having those conversations when we smoked together.

Im going to miss her but at this point I'm fairly certain she's not the woman I fell in love with anymore. I don't know who this woman is. I suppose that I hurt her too much. But in the end she had her revenge I guess.