Gan, I had my first counselling session today. They will allow me 6 sessions free of charge and then I will have to find my own IC. I am hoping for a recommendation my current IC specialises in spouses of gamblers and may know of an abuse related specialist.
I saw a codependency specialist late last year and was analysed as non codependent, mainly I think because I have not enabled the gambling.
I think this H is the first time there has been abuse in my sitch, and I will explore that. Neither of my parents were abusive and other than the odd bullying at school (V was a science nerd) I can not recollect any issues. I had a couple of Besties then plus I loved university and my post grad. My first M was very happy and loving and I still miss H1 (who died age 31). H2 was a gentleman and very quiet and peaceable. Chatterbox with a vino in him and loved entertaining.
BD1 in March 2014 was my reaction to the early abuse and I think this started when H left his job in Jan 2014. Screaming Banshee was my reaction, truly horrible of me, but now I am glad I have SB strength on my side as my ally. CBT training helped me use her strength.
I feel like I am the frog dropped into warm water who is gradually boiled.
I am blown away by the kindness and support here on this board.
V
Last edited by Vanilla; 03/11/1504:34 PM.
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
