Douchebag is just about the nicest thing I've called him
He travels a lot, I bet he's got a new GF. Probably used the same "frigid wife" story too.
W tried to tell me last night that he's not really a bad person. Keeping my food down is a challenge sometimes.
She had a panic attack when we got home from the gym last night. Not cruel, just panicky. But I kept my cool. Ended up being one of the most respectful and productive R talks we've had in a long time. She says she doesn't feel progress, but I see little bits and pieces all the time. If she doesn't feel connection with me, why does she always run to me when she's freaking out?
Last edited by Rzrback; 03/11/1511:03 AM.
Ex Rzrback Me 43 Her 44 D11, D15 T21, M19 BD 9/9/2014 Piecing
Sometimes if you want to see a change for the better, you have to take things into your own hands - Clint Eastwood
I know that W has seen OM today at work. I also fully expect another panic like she had yesterday. She literally had her hands on her knees, trying to catch her breath. She's terrified of staying with me and staying unhappy, she's terrified of letting me go and being unhappy, she's terrified of being alone, she's terrified of everything. She hasn't done anything wrong that I know of, but I know the fact that he's in town this week is stressing her out. Any ideas on how I should handle this?
Ex Rzrback Me 43 Her 44 D11, D15 T21, M19 BD 9/9/2014 Piecing
Sometimes if you want to see a change for the better, you have to take things into your own hands - Clint Eastwood
You can empathize with W and leave it alone. "I can only imagine how rough and confusing this is for you. I know that you'll figure things out." Smile and then turn to the kitchen to cook...whatever.
Might want to read up on the Boundaries Cheat Sheet to prevent your talks from going off the rails AGAIN. Boundaries: Cheat Sheet
Unexpected good night last night. Had dinner, board games with our Ds, we curled up in bed to watch TV.
Neither one of us mentioned OM or our R, not even obliquely.
I'm sure she's trying to live "as if", like our C recommended. I agree that we need to lay off each other. I liked it, but of course I second-guess everything I do. Am I letting her back too easily? I do feel like she's really trying.
Last edited by Rzrback; 03/12/1511:21 AM.
Ex Rzrback Me 43 Her 44 D11, D15 T21, M19 BD 9/9/2014 Piecing
Sometimes if you want to see a change for the better, you have to take things into your own hands - Clint Eastwood
I got back from the gym and she had another emotional crash. Out of nowhere. I know she's not doing anything wrong; she's not contacting him, but I know it's all about him. How do I handle this? I'm not willing to cheerlead her where he's concerned, but I want to be there for her. I know she's trying. I'm just trying to keep things up at this point. I'm sick of living my life around her and her unstable moods and by extension, him.
Ex Rzrback Me 43 Her 44 D11, D15 T21, M19 BD 9/9/2014 Piecing
Sometimes if you want to see a change for the better, you have to take things into your own hands - Clint Eastwood
