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#2546155 03/10/15 09:50 AM
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Last edited by Vanilla; 03/10/15 09:55 AM.

Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW


Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
V
Vanilla Offline OP
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I am here again, almost twelve months since WAW and BD(1) and now we have BD (3).

BD1 (V)- V needs space
BD2 (H)- H finds V unattractive
BD3 (V)- V will no longer be abused and has left

V has the courage to walk away. Now silence and peace.

V


Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW


Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 8,855
V
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V

This is the start of my new life. No more abuse and without my DB friends and this board I would still be suffering from verbal and emotional abuse. Domestic Abuse for which H may be prosecuted IDK, not in my hands.

Am I standing, yes I am but with a new boundary 'I will not be verbally and emotionally abused'.

Thank you:

Gg- for sharing your history of abuse which enabled me to straight talk about it. And for all the love, care and support.

Toots- For showing the way forwards and how to stand with dignity

Edz- for the PMA posts and simply being there and for the on line share of BFT

RD- for being the loving modest RD, yours was my very first post on the board as I admired your way of a loving family

Z- for posts in the darkest hours before the sunrise

Gan-for intrepidness and travel GAL personified- I love finding out about your travel

Dawn- for loving support

Jim- for sheer determination and wise words

RPP- for straightforward talking and stating the obvious

OD-for being OD and sharing his sitch with honesty

Wonka- for the pushing on and 'no sitting on your laurels now' view. No nonsense sound advice with that loving touch.

To Susan, Train, Mza and all those of you sending me love and support. I will try to return it multiplied. I just want to wrap you all up and cuddle you to my heart, especially the wet woollen lambie and purring BFT.

This thread will be about practical stuff, sorting Fins.

Oh, and of course, there is always laughter here on our threads, lightness with dark. Piffle with meaning.

V




Last edited by Vanilla; 03/10/15 10:29 AM.

Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose.
V 64, WAW


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Hi V you're more than welcome, there's a post for you on my thread smile Take it easy and be vanilla unwound for a little while, have you thought about some cello music btw i used to find it exceedingly theraputic, not *right* now as it has memories attached but yo-yo ma has some amazing recordings.

Just a thought for the Vanilla theraputic spa wink


M:44, W:46, S:10
M 13 years, T 15
BD:23/7/2014
W/S Moved to MIL: 23/7/2014
My new place: 21/11/2014
W/S back to flat 22/11/2014
W coming closer, talking 4/2015
Piecing 5/2015
Moving in again 6/2015
edz #2546175 03/10/15 11:35 AM
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You are making the right move. You are incredibly strong.


40s 2teens M14Y
BD-10/12/13 rec-1/14
BD2-5/14 rec2-9/14
EA disc-10/14 4/15-BD 3 and triangulation ensues
Served with D6/15 MS forced to leave7/15
D agreement signed 8/16 final 5/17
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Wow, V. Just noticed your new signature.

Hugs. You are important to me and so many of us here. Even if virtual, V is a real person out there and I want her to be happy and loved.

My mom endured my father with some grace and did the best she could for a number of years until she couldn't. She found my step father who treats her like a queen. They have been happily married for over ten years, doing their crosswords, watching specials on owls, living in gentle supportive peace.

I am glad you've found your courage. The happiness you've found despite your situation will only increase. Abuse is a poison no matter what shields we create against it.

What are you doing to celebrate this change?


Mid 30's
Psych-abusive M with violent tantrums from XH
D 9/15; NC forever on

You can't DR your way out of abuse.



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Sounding strong Vanillia. Take time for yourself. No drama, must be nice.

Take care, Rd

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Thanks for the shout out, V. You have always been so upbeat and positive on the boards, but I wasn't always convinced you really were feeling that inside. I sincerely hope that distancing yourself from the abuse allows you to feel that peace and positivity that you show us. You deserve a break.



"Don't look back, you aren't going that way"
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V, have you thought about how you will handle if H pledges to change and begs you to come back? Are you prepared for this? I am sure you are in good hands with your counselors and other support groups and you certainly sound like you're in a good place right now. Been thinking of you.


Mid 30's
Psych-abusive M with violent tantrums from XH
D 9/15; NC forever on

You can't DR your way out of abuse.



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Originally Posted By: Zelda09
V, have you thought about how you will handle if H pledges to change and begs you to come back? Are you prepared for this? I am sure you are in good hands with your counselors and other support groups and you certainly sound like you're in a good place right now. Been thinking of you.
What makes you think that might happen?

And my suggestion would to believe nothing that he says and half of what he does.


Me-70, D37,S36
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