Hi Joe, I think it's all about balance. GAL helps with detaching and is for your own sanity as much as anything else. GAL helps you to see that, despite your sitch, there are opportunities out there to do new things you enjoy.

Your W may react to GAL, because you being out and doing new things is not how she thought this would go.

In terms of the validating etc. I think that is about making the most of opportunities that arise when you and your W are in contact. So, if you have a five minute convo in the kitchen and she had a tough day, you can validate. But then, you are off because you have things planned already...

T 13 M 7
Me 48 H 46
SS 15
BD 7.14 PA
D final 5.16 (H filed)

We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus