Susana (7) - Like a big pizza pie

[susana4]

Thanks Train!

Well, he was already like a bee buzzing around this morning after I put on the outfit--
"Oh, is that a new top? That's nice."
"I like your necklace!! So pretty."
"I'm loving all your new outfits"

I'm still feeling a bit frustrated. I know it's impatience, and losing hope. When we were joking around and brushing our teeth this morning, I just kept thinking how anyone looking in would think we were a normal married couple, and not even realise we are heading for D. How can he act the same?! It's just so weird. I just don't see him changing his mind.

My friend said to me the other day (this is why I don't talk to friends about my sitch but he brought it up)-- "I'm not saying you're doing anything wrong, but I don't get how you can live with someone that won't tell you what they want". Which isn't true, he has told me what he wants, his actions just don't match his words sometimes. But I am scared, scared my friends are right, I am just setting myself up to get hurt more. Maybe by living together and doing stuff together I'm just prolonging the pain. This is why I have the urge to run away.

There's a scared little girl in me, even though I try to be strong on the outside, and she wants to be safe.

(Eirinn - they lock when they get to 100 posts, usually around 11 pages. You can tell because you can no longer reply)