There is a 12 step saying for codependents about the addictive behaviour (WAS to their addictions, their EA/PA gambling, alcohol, smoking, etc...) and those of us addicted to the addict.
We are not the cause We can not control And We can give no cure
the addict
We can only manage our own dependency
Very early on one of my mentors recommended a book to me. simple to the point and explains in English the very basics. I have read and reread the book as every time I do, I get more from it.
It is codependency for dummies by Darlene Lancer. I understand this better than codepend no more. It is a very strong recommendation to you. I was not diagnosed as codependent although I exhibits some of the behavious. It is very hard for an ADD to be codependent as they are easily distracted, GAL is a wonderful technique for me. This book is full of definitions, basics, diagrams and references. And is one of the few books that I revisit time after time and helpful as an approach to understanding addiction and my own recovery from the affects of this in my life.
I am lucky to have loving caring Gamanon mentors that remind me from time to time to revisit the basics. Al turtle on line stuff, (for teenagers) and this book. A gentle 2x4, and realistically this has helped me become more understanding and work from my own heart.
Stay with this MCS as the process works. 12 steps and DB work in harmony a book like this will explain why addicts rewrite history and how to use techniques to stabilise your own view so that the distortion is ineffective and less damaging.
Dreams are useful guides MCS to our underlying desires and wants. That is process.
Time MCS is on your side. Your children sound so loving, I could eat up every word about them like a delicious treat.
Dream on
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
