I'm in such a better place then I was when I started. Honestly healing ,myself and focusing on my D's has been all I've been doing for months. You are probably right I haven't detached..... I'm not at a point where her spew doesn't affect me and I am not completely indifferent to walking down this path to divorce.
I'm at a class at work but just had to address this. You ARE detaching. And doing really well. Don't be so hard on yourself Andy. I doubt that anyone is honestly completely immune to feeling hurt when their former lover and best friend lashes out irrationally and unfairly. You're doing fine. Let it roll off your back the best you can, and carry on.
Linda
Me 65, Ex 64 M 38 y 2 adult S, 4 G-Kids MLC 11/07 BD 12/09 D 3/14 Dating nice guy 7/14 Engaged to nice guy 12/17