Glad to hear you coming back and posting about what's going on with you.
All I can say is one day at a time...one foot in front of another. Sometimes reminders of our former spouses sends us in a tailspin. I had a wobble over the last weekend after talking with Ms. Wonka this past Friday during one of our rare phone calls and I had a good cry the very next day.
That emotion, what I identify, is called the pesky "what-ifs' that races inside our noggins. Dang little critter called rumination....grrrr. Be gone and leave me alone!