Complex No. 6 - The turtle and the rabbit

[Complex]

Complex, the more I follow your sitch and learn about these interactions, the more I'm convinced that your challenge is more of a "career path" one than a "marriage/infidelity' one.

I think if your wife were more convinced of your likelihood for success and stability, she'd be back with you by now. HOWEVER, you need to decide if you want to be married to someone who -- when she doesn't feel secure financially -- not only cuts and runs, but runs to another MAN.


Starsky

Yes....and yes! Good observation...I figured this out a couple weeks ago. That it took me that long is pretty crazy. I def needed to mature to see the bigger picture.

Right now I actually am so convinced that I can have a great relationship with her----from my side. Meeting her needs and understanding her and be myself and pursue my dreams and work hard for our family. It's a very legit question if I want a person who doesn't really match my own values about committment. But I believe in her being a good person.

It's simple: I continue. I can only do my best. That's all I have. If she follows at some point under my terms...good, no one knows. If she's the fool and leaves for good I'll eventually be fine and my next R will be awesome too.
One thing is for sure..I wouldn't be here today where I am without any of this happening, so I have to be thankful!