I do have moments where I do feel and know that I am handling this well considering everything... But then I do have moments where I wonder if I could be handling it better or doing something different... But I guess we all go through that when we are dealing with this and we try to make the best decisions we can in the moment.
To be fair to myself -- confiding in the family member happened very early after BD before I'd learned much about MLC or DB or anything and everything else I've learned since then... Had I known all of what I know now, I might not have confided as much in this family member. But then again -- I do have to keep in mind that now there are some real consequences occurring for her as a result of her actions.
In one of his last messages to me, this family member said "Please don't feel as if you have done anything wrong. You haven't. Quite the opposite actually."
In other news, W has a really bad cold -- came home on Sunday with it. At the beginning of last week she asked if she could start taking the kids to school in the mornings (she has never done this except when I've been out of town or when I had an early morning meeting -- very rare), so she did that every day last week. This week - I've been taking them because she's too sick in the morning. Today she is staying home from work because she says she was up all night coughing. How convenient that I'm still living in the house and able to easily take the kids to school instead of her and say "No problem, get some rest." 'Guess what babe, when we are both single parents and in possession of the kids... There won't be someone else there to bring the kids to school when we feel like death warmed over -- doesn't matter how sick we feel, we will still have to pull ourselves out of bed, get dressed, fix breakfast, and take the kids to school.' I'm sure she's not thinking about that right now though...
Me 48, Her 50 (Same-Sex Couple) 3 Children Together: 9.5 years before BD BD: Week of 10/27/14 ExW started EA w OW 9/2014 ExW married OW 12/2015
