If you're dialing it back JUST to try to respond in some certain way to her -- and it's not authentic to you -- then I agree with your mentor. As 25 pointed out to you above, your W is way too much in your head, so yeah I'd just be yourself (so long as you con't cross over into "pursuing."
I might also advise you to be a little more outgoing if these are the ONLY opportunities your W has of seeing you interact, whereas if there are times during the week and month that she is able to observe you, in person, interacting with other people (especially other women), I think you could be shorter with her ("treat her like a neighbor") and she'd still be able to see the witty, charming, confident Complex in his interactions with, say, the moms at the soccer fields and the like (just using that as an example, for others following along).
